P.S: This post was inspired by a post I read on AMAZONIAN NAIJA QUEEN’S BLOG, it just hit me that we are all guilty of this and the last time someone asked me questions pertaining this, I answered in a way that I became ashamed of myself. I also have to stress that this post is not to criticize anyone or even Amazonian naija queen but to advice us all; thank you.
I have often wondered why people have dreams, expectations that are simply not feasible, realistic but idealist at best. Let me explain it to you the best way I can.
Everyone has dreams, list of how they want their partner to look or the qualities they expect for the person to possess; he must be tall, handsome, generous; she must be pretty, sexy, humble, gentle, the list could go on indefinitely.
Sure we’ve all done it at one time or the other but guys, ladies it should not be a must have list! Have you ever thought or asked yourself if you actually meet same criteria or if you are THAT PERSON’ s type too? You do not want to think about that do you? So if everyone chooses the handsome guy or pretty lady with all the supposedly right qualities then just so you know, right back at you, are you sure you are same?
Have you ever asked yourself whose type you are?
Oh I’m sure some people would say – ‘go for what you believe in, whatever you want’ or they would say ‘they would pray and God would answer their prayers and give them whatever they ask’ Granted; but I tell you, have you not noticed that there are times God does not really answer your prayers the way you would want because they are totally unreasonable and at best, frivolous; they are not His wish for you. When you keep hounding God and He obliges you the so called partner, you’re happy. When he/ she starts to misbehave you blame God; now I must ask; why should you?! You made your bed, lie on it!
If you go for the guy/ lady and succeed, it would always be on you to make it work with the ‘special person’ making no effort at all and worse still if the so called ‘ perfect dream person’ is aware of his/ her power over you, the blackmail starts because of your one sided feelings.
Grow up everyone! Try not to see life through a maze, be realistic and never ever lie to yourself.
There was this guy asking me out, he really did like me I’d concede to that but he went about it the wrong way. Anyway, when this issue came up, he said I’m his type and I’ve got the right features at the right places and blah! I asked him about the girl he was rolling with and he said:
“She knows the deal, she’s short, too short for me amongst other things; I’ve told her I can’t marry her, she’s not my wife material, the one I have in my head that I’d love to settle down with”
“But you’re sleeping with her” I say;
“Of course I am, she’s crazy in bed and I love that, but she’s not my type, outside of the bedroom”
I was not surprised to hear him say that but I wasn’t impressed either;
“Have you considered if you are my type? If, Infact, you are what I want?” I asked him-
He had no answer to that and I didn’t even expect him to. The fact that you want a particular person does not make you the person’s type and that is the whole essence of this post. I just hope that I made my point and we don’t make mistakes please okay? Because it won’t be nice if we do. Let’s just try to look at the big picture and not be myopic.
My love for you makes blogging easier.